How does it feel to identify as broken and immensely different from all those around you? If these feelings continue and compound, then one ends up feeling mentally ill---doomed to be always on the outside of normal.

Chris Wells joins us today from The Gifted Development Center in Westminster, CO. We met at the SENG conference, and then Chris’ name came up again in a conversation with Kate Arms, our guest from Episode 93. Chris has the knowledge and in-depth experience on the topic of positive disintegration. Her story is amazing--and you don’t want to miss it!

Something new we’re doing here in the Embracing Intensity community is profiling different members of the community to share who we are, what we’ve figured out, and how we can get to know and understand each other better. I’m giving you a sneak peek of my interview with Javon Fernanders, and you can find out more when you join us at Embracing Intensity.

Show Highlights:

• What Chris is intensely passionate about, in light of her history of mental illness and giftedness--and why she’s become an advocate
• What intensity looks like for someone who had “mental illness” since a young age
• Why it’s taken Chris her whole life to temper the way she is and to be able to move through the world without causing problems
• How intensity made everything more difficult because no one understood and she always felt alien and different
• How she spent 12 years on disability for bipolar and panic disorder, wondering, “What’s wrong with me?”
• Positive disintegration: a sign of strong developmental potential that says, “You are NOT broken.”
• What it means to be an empath and to no longer feel so alone
• The cultural factors that affected Chris and the messages she was raised with
• Why she wishes people would have encouraged her in the things she wanted to do
• How she “tuned herself out” and used her gifts to make adults’ lives difficult as a teen
• How Chris got on the path to “figuring things out”--after getting kicked out of high school, going to drug rehab, and writing a book
• Overexcitability and how it is misunderstood
• Chris’ younger life---”Intensity out of control”
• Why she felt like her personality wasn’t working anymore
• How she uses her fire for good, in studying positive disintegration in incredible depth
• Why she began studying Dabrowski’s Theory of Positive Disintegration
• What has helped in harnessing the power of Chris’ intensity and how “life flows more now”
• The best advice anyone ever gave Chris: From Linda Silverman, “Stop trying to fit in--and study Dabrowski’s theory.”
• Personal habits that help her use her fire in positive ways, like writing
• Books that have influenced Chris the most:
  • Ordinary People by Judith Guest
  • Mellow Out by Michael Piechowski
  • Living with Intensity by Susan Daniels and Michael Piechowski
• How Chris helps others use their own fire
• Building community and connection with support and affirmation

Resources:

Chris Tane Wells

Parents of Twice Exceptional Kids

We are super excited to have Heather Boorman, of the Fringy Bit Podcast, share her talk on Self-Compassion from the SENG (Supporting the Emotional Needs of the Gifted) conference last summer!

Self-Compassion has been proven to be an effective mindset and intervention toward more sustainable mental health and self-concept. This presentation will apply the work of Dr. Kristin Neff in the field of self-compassion to the gifted population and typical struggles faced by many gifted individuals. In particular, we will consider how Dabrowski’s super-stimulabilities and other typical psychosocial traits can lead to perfectionism, imposter syndrome, self-judgment, low frustration tolerance, depression, and anxiety. We will consider the ways in which society’s responses to giftedness and emphasis on self-esteem can also contribute to un-wellness in gifted children, youth, and adults. Self-compassion will then be defined and defended as an effective intervention toward increased wellness. Attendees will be introduced to, and participate in, exercises to increase self-compassion. The session will be a blend of lecture and interactive.

Learning Objectives:

1. Participants will be able to identify at least 5 psychosocial traits typical within the gifted population
2. Participants will be able to explain how typical psychosocial experiences of gifted individuals may contribute to un-wellness in the forms of perfectionism, imposter syndrome, low frustration tolerance, self-judgment, and mental health issues.
3. Participants will be able to define self-compassion and identify the 3 components that contribute to self-compassion
4. Participants will be able to identify and implement at least 3 interventions to increase self-compassion.

About the Author:

Heather Boorman lives an intensely joy-filled and full life as a homeschooling mom to 3 fringy kids and the executive director and therapist with Boorman Counseling. She passionately advocates for differently wired kids and adults through her work as a national speaker, writer & podcaster at The Fringy Bit. Heather’s also the author of The Gifted Kids Workbook, which provides mindfulness-based activities to help kids reduce stress, balance emotions, and build confidence.

About Embracing Intensity Group Calls:

Each month on the second Saturday, we will have a guest speaker dive into a topic they love followed by a discussion with the group. The talk will be shared on the podcast, but the discussion will only be shared with Embracing Intensity community members and patrons. The calls will be on the Zoom platform, which allows you to interact at whatever level you'd like (video, audio or use photo and chat box). There will be an opportunity for further discussion in the Embracing Intensity Community.

Links:

Fringy Bit Podcast

Embracing Intensity Community

Are you a humanitarian? Today's episode is with Jaiden Love, a healer, educator, and humanitarian and the author of the book Saving My Life. Jaiden is a very spiritual person who has been passionate about serving and helping others for all of his life. He has been running his own business for the last ten years, and although it has continually morphed and changed over this time, it has always been about helping people to live their truth. Listen in today to find out about Jaiden and the way that he helps people to become the very best version of themselves.

Jaiden has a really huge heart and wonderful energy that radiates right through the screen and microphone. As a healer, he is passionate about helping others to do their own inner work, so that they can learn to live their truth and their happiest life. As an educator, Jaiden strives to give people the tools to treat others with more compassion and respect. The combination of the two allows him to create and hold a safe space for people to reach the ultimate goal of greater connectedness and love in the world. Listen in to find out what Jaiden has to share in today's episode.

Show highlights:

• How politics helped Jaiden to realize that he is actually a humanitarian.
• Jaiden discusses the mindset block that he has always had towards being political, even though he now sees that being a humanitarian is a type of political stance.
• The impact that Jaiden's intensity, sensitivity, and creativity had on him while growing up.
• Jaiden has been putting other people's needs and happiness for most of his life. Now he knows that he needs to first take care of himself, in order to really be of help to others.
• Jaiden is black and he was adopted and raised by a white family in a small, mostly white town, so there were a number of cultural factors that affected the way he expressed himself while growing up.
• The difficulties that most people have with expressing their truth to themselves and to others.
• Jaiden worked as a high-school counselor for about five years and listening to the students talking to him about their troubled home-lives had a deep impact on him, both emotionally and physically.
• Jaiden is really passionate about nutrition and he sees that most people just don't realize how much the things they put in and onto their bodies actually affects them emotionally.
• Jaiden started out as an energy healer and he explains why he combined spiritual coaching with that.
• Jason explains that everything that is experienced on the physical level starts on the emotional and spiritual level.
• Giving people the tools to cope with issues of gender identity.
• The odd reactions that people tend to have towards the words 'God' and 'spirituality'.
• Living your own truth, regardless of who and how you are.
• The importance of feeling safe, and having love and support in your life.
• What Jaiden's book, Saving My Life, is all about. The book is available from Amazon.

Links:

Jaiden's website: Held And Heard

Jaiden's email: jaiden@heldandheard.com

Jaiden's phone number: 503 757 1454

Jaiden is on Linkedin

To receive a 45-minute free consultation from Jaiden, contact him and tell him that you listened to this podcast.

Resources:

Books:

Saving My Life by Jaden Jemel Love

Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse

The Disappearance of the Universe by Gary Renard

The Abundance Book by John Randolf Price

A Course In Miracles

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

Our Find Your Power Zone Tool-kit Challenge starts on the 14th of January, as a way to kick off the growth of our new Embracing Intensity Community. Go to Embracing Intensity to find out more about the challenge and about our new community.

I'm back after my month off! I was supposed to be resting and taking a break, but last week I had some divine inspiration for the direction of the year to come!

In this episode:

• I share about my entrepreneurial journey the past 4-5 years.
• It all comes back to listening to your gut over "conventional wisdom"
• Creating a vibrant community both online and in person. 
• A peek at our upcoming events for 2019!

Links:

Power Zone Toolkit

Embracing Intensity Community